Lyrics help

[domsyodaddy13]

I need some help with these lyrics to a song. The song is basically about a great war that lasts a thousand years. Just post your Ideas here. Thanx.

[Chum]

Any phrases or choruses that you know?

[domsyodaddy13]

no not really. I've almost got the chorus but not really.

[Generic]

Ohh God, only you can help us now,
Our idiot shrub of a President has
Screwed us with a cow.

We are stuck in this war forever
Because he is a lier
Why can't it just stop
We have no more men for hire.

[JoeyG]

The Great War
Will last a thousand years
While across the water
The reason is clear

Everybody hates
Impaled upon Hell's Gates
Oh, ####, I'm just too late
Everyone is going to fall to the dirt



You don't get good lyrics for free.
EDIT: On the other hand, your avatar is incredibly hot...

[domsyodaddy13]

I kno. I'm talking about an old style war. No the effing war in iraq.

[JoeyG]

I know. I just like saying "across the water". That's why I don't write a lot of war songs.

The one that I did write had the line:
The hostages freed today will be subjected to, subjected to, an unforgiving leech, a media #####, always wants more, always wants more, always standing on the mother####ing poor.

Or somehting like that... don't steal that line.

[domsyodaddy13]

Already did. jk. lol.

I like that format thhough continue with your lyric help

[denacioust]

If the lyrics aren't sincere then I can tell that your song will really not be good. You're lyrics need to be from you and not just throwing together something that rhymes. (I mean unless you wanna be Gwen Stefani...B-A-N-A-N-A-S)

The best way I can tell you to write lyrics is to just write down a few words on paper that you think would add to the song...write them in an order and your brain should start to make connections between the words and a song should start to emerge. It works for me anyway.

[JoeyG]

My original tactic was to write anything that popped into my head down... but they didn't turn into songs very often, until finally I made a song containing a week's worth of awesome rhymes. So the lyrics were great, just very disjointed.

If you can't make your own lyrics, you probably won't be able to improve too much.

[denacioust]

If you don't make your own lyrics, you probably won't be able to improve too much.


Thats better...

[domsyodaddy13]

I have lyrics they just suck. I just need help, hence the name LYRICS HELP. I need some ideas, not a full song. So just post Ideas nothing else just ideas.

[ehntoo]

I have lyrics they just suck. I just need help, hence the name LYRICS HELP. I need some ideas, not a full song. So just post Ideas nothing else just ideas.
Well, post some of your lyrics which you're convinced suck so badly and we'll help you develop them.

[Yeno]

heres the chorus:

War is Hell. But then is this hell?
God please save this War!!!!.
Why cant the pain end and all violence be put to a stop!!!.

(yeah, my lyrics suck so dont flame me)

[domsyodaddy13]

Yeno.../
Thats good ideas. All I need is ideas.

Heres what I got so far:

Am I the last one here?
Standing upon this bloodstained hill.
Waiting for redemption

The clouds above cry
As I look to the broken sky
Waiting for Redemption

Chorus:

(Working on it)

[ehntoo]

Yeno.../
Thats good ideas. All I need is ideas.

Heres what I got so far:

Am I the last one here?
Standing upon this bloodstained hill.
Waiting for redemption

The clouds above cry
As I look to the broken sky
Waiting for Redemption

Chorus:

(Working on it)
Here's another suggestion: Make your music first. It'll help inspire you for the words.

[Yeno]

yeah, I need to know what type of music is it and what instruments, the beats per minute(not really but it would help though) the main beat, how lond it is and all that

[domsyodaddy13]

I have music for it already. It's rock. All of it is like piano soft rock except for the chorus. Thats hard rock.

[exorcist]

maybe have it from a first person view, like a soldier or something?

[Yeno]

that would sound nice if you worked hard on it!

[rammer124]

Holy God, help us!
our president hath destroyed us!
Only you can save us!
before we, bite the dust....(fade out)


Thats all a joke, dont consider it at all.

I liked that earlier post about our president screwing us with a cow... nice touch.

[mets6891]

It all sounds good, but try to use better vocabulary. I'm not saying exceedingly long words. Just use more descriptive words. Trust me, it makes a song better.

that would sound nice if you worked hard on it!

Almost all your posts end in an exclamation mark.